


Yeah...I Love That Man...

by wickedwiccan



Category: Deadpool - Fandom, Spider-Man - Fandom, spideypool - Fandom
Genre: Cave, Distractions, M/M, Map - Freeform, mission, pinning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-10
Updated: 2016-07-10
Packaged: 2018-07-22 17:22:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7447657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wickedwiccan/pseuds/wickedwiccan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is the story Peter was telling Bruce in Lame Halloween Party: Avengers edition:</p>
<p>Crime fighting had become quite boring as of late for our friendly neighborhood Spider-man. The only criminals wreaking havoc for the past few months were lowly muggers and thieves. They were nothing the young arachnid couldn't easily handle. So, when Fury recruited him for a mission, Spidey was more than happy to oblige. Though something was askew. He had a partner, but the director wouldn't let on who exactaly. At least the mission would be interesting!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Yeah...I Love That Man...

**Author's Note:**

> Again, this story is based off of one from my other fics. I actually like this one a lot. The other one though, well... it's not my best work. Even so, I'll just leave a little link down here that leads to it...
> 
> http://archiveofourown.org/works/7209731
> 
> You don't have to read it to understand this one, but it would be an honor if you would check it out!

A mission. Finally.  
It had gotten boring just patrolling the city these past few months. There weren't any big criminals wreaking havoc, so it had been pretty quiet minus a few bank robberies and other petty crime. Don't get me wrong, I liked the break...at first. Now i'm just bored. Well...was. 

So Fury called me in. it was a simple mission: infiltrate the base and obtain the data, distroy everything else. He told me he’d send me in with a partner though. Someone who would handle the destruction part. Fury didn't say who. I asked but he ignored the question completely. I just figured it’d be Hulk. Me and the big guy get along pretty well, and dealing with him had never been an issue before. Oh, but I was so utterly wrong.

I arrived at the designated area via helicopter. The entrance to the hideout was a cave at the top of a mountain, thus the only way to reach it quick enough would be by air.  
Before I landed, an agent gave me a recap of the mission.  
“Get in, find the documents, get out. Your partner will do the rest.”  
“Right...and who is my partner exactly?”  
The blonde woman seemed surprised, “You mean director Fury never told you?”’  
“Uh...no?”  
“I see...well...he has the map, so good luck.”  
“Good luck?”  
Before I could interrogate her further, we landed. I was shooed off the ‘copter and onto the large platform just before the mouth of the cave.  
“Call in when the mission’s complete.” she hollered, tossing me a phone.  
I watched as the flying machine took off and eventually flew out of sight. I sighed, knowing well that this ‘partner’ was going to be a handful, whoever he was. And I was quite right.

“Baaaaaaaaaaaaby boy! <3”  
I turned around slowly, knowing well who was behind me.  
“How wonderful, huh? We get our own mission to ourselves! Can you believe it? Fury asked me to help!”  
I put a palm to my face, “Wade...yeah um...weren't you off on a...on a job?”  
“Yepers, I was, but when Fury called me saying he was going to put me on a team with you, I just couldn't resist!”  
“I-I see.”  
“Something wrong Spidey?” he turned his head ever so slightly.  
“I just- I uh...just behave okay? No explosions until I give the okay.”  
“Anything for you baby boy.”  
I could see his grin though his mask. Sometimes I felt unsettled by that, but really I shouldn't be. I loved to see his expression, his face. Every little wrinkle of his brow, turn of his lips, flare of his nostrils, everything was beautiful, even his scars. I admit it, and have many times aloud and to other people, that I love this man before me. He completes me in his own wacky Wade Wilson way, and I like to feel I complete him as well. Even so, working with him has always been an issue.  
He get off task real fast. He's reckless and dangerous, not towards me but with anything and anyone else. His morals aren't completely righteous and he constantly harasses me. Which, in any other case, I would be fine with, but not while I'm working. So, this mission was going to be interesting. Which is good...to a point. He wouldn't hurt me or put me in harms way. He’s even saved me times before, but distractions are distractions. With a mission like this one, it needs to be completed quickly and efficiently. I have no clue as to why Fury would stick us on the same team, alone for that matter, other than he's completely out of options or he owes Deadpool. (the later of the two,I highly doubt) Anyway, I was ready for anyone but him; though, I shouldn't have been surprised.

“You have the map, Wade?”  
“Yep!” He patted one of the pockets on his belt and continued to grin at me. “Right here!”  
“...”  
“...”  
“Can I see it?”  
“Oh sure.”  
He began rummaging through his pocket, pulling out strange things. Some were slightly reasonable, others I had no clue as to how he fit them in there.  
After his third pocket, he finally found it.  
“Here it is!”  
I reached for it, only to have it snatched away from me,  
“Ah Ah Ahh,” Wade tutted, “I'm the keeper of the map!”  
“Sure you are, now let me see it.” I lunged for it again and he stepped out of the way.  
“They gave it to me, so that means I'm the one navigating.”  
I sighed, just wanting to get the job over with already, “Fine. You'll have to take us straight to the labs. They should have the papers there.”  
Deadpool unfolded the little white square. He held it up, purposely away from my view.  
“Ah! Wow!”  
“What?!”  
“It has the whole cave mapped out. Like in a video game! I wonder if there’s treasure in some of these empty places.”  
“Ugggh. Wade, we don't have time for this-”  
He pouted, “There’s always time for treasure baby boy.”  
Folding up the paper once more, Wade began into the cave. All I could do was helplessly follow him.  
\---  
Now, I could treat this as a trust exercise and let Wade lead the way, or I could steal the map and get the job done. The mission did need to be completed A.S.A.P. If we are found out before we get the documents, things could turn ugly.  
Even so, Wade seemed to be having fun. But I didn’t know how big the cave was. It could take hours to look everywhere, and if I go off on my own, I was sure to get lost.  
So I decided…  
“Hey Wade.” I cooed. making my way towards him.  
“What’s up-oh! You’re super close babes”  
“Yeah...I was just thinking…”  
“Thinking?” he quirked a brow as I twirled a finger on his chest.  
“Yeah, thinking. We haven't seen each other in a few days, what with your job and all.”  
“Mmmhmm.”  
“And now were here...alone…”  
“We are.” his grin returned, this time more lewd.  
“I’ve missed you.”  
“So have I.”  
“And your touch.”  
“Really?”  
I moved in closer, “and your love”  
I kept up the charade, slowing bringing my arms up to his shoulder and leaning into him. I then took my time reaching to grab the map from his belt as I distracted him with my words.  
“You have?”  
“Of course.”  
My hands were almost in his pockets when I felt something clamp down on them, halting their movements.  
“You’re a sneaky little bug, aren't you?”  
I gulped, looking up at his smug expression.  
‘N-not a bug...arachnid…’ is what I thought but dare not say. He had that look in his eye, and though I couldn't see it, I've known Deadpool long enough to hear it in his voice.  
“Naughty naughty. You know what you've started right, baby boy?”  
I tried to rip myself from his grip to no avail. I may be stronger than the norm, but Wade could still hold me if he meant business.  
He lifted my arms above my head, smacking them right back into the wall. I faced away from him as he pinned me there.  
“Are you going to take responsibility?” I could feel his breath on my ear as he whispered from behind.  
Wade’s other hand began to trail up the upper half of his suit. I tried not to react to the gentle touch, but the light graze of his gloved fingertips were difficult to ignore. And then, he lifted both our masks slightly, planting kisses on my neck and cheek.  
“S-stop...W-Wade…”  
“Why?” He breathed, “You’re the one who started it.”  
“I-I...W-Wade…” it came out as a whine as he moved his hand to my ass. “Cut-cut it out! W-we're on a...m-m-mission...for pete sake!”  
“For your sake?” he chuckled, now caressing my growing bulge. “That wasn't in the debriefing.”  
“S-Stop!”  
“You mean don't stop right?”  
“Wade-”  
“You know you like it.”  
“This is not the time-”  
“We’re alone.”  
“Were on a mission!”  
“So?”  
As red as my mask was, I was probably just about under my mask.  
“Fuck off Wade! If you keep this up I’ll…”  
“You’ll what?” he leered.  
“I’ll....um…No…” Damn I didn't want to do this, “ NO SEX FOR A WEEK!”  
Wade froze in his groping. It was like I had hit the pause button on him.  
“You...you don't mean that...do you?”  
“F-fuck yes I do. Now cut it out!”  
He let go of me. He could overpower me if he wanted. Even if he’d done it right there and I crefused him for a week, he could still physically force me. But that wasn't Wade. He wasn't one to stoop so low as to rape me. He knew I'd be mad if he tried, even if I’d eventually submit to him (and I would because it's him). He knows a mad Spidey is just venom for him; living hell until I forgive him.  
“Alright...but no more stealing my map or I'll pounce on you! <3” he grinned again and I could only imagine the wink that went with it.  
\---  
His threat didn't stop me from trying. I kept at it for a while, but Wade always turned it around. I was up against a wall more than I would have like that day, so I eventually gave up after about twenty tries.  
It took about three hours for him to be satisfied with the cave. He kept going on about finding pots to smash, but I didn't understand why the cave would have any. There weren't, by the way, and there was no treasure. Wade seemed pretty upset about that, but I was able to cheer him up with the reminder that he would be able to blow the whole place up when we were done. That seemed to get him back to his happy-go-lucky ways.

It took me about ten minutes to find the documents, eight minutes to round up the people there, and three to have Deadpool lead us outside. I webbed up the baddies as my partner (in more ways than one) destroyed the cave and it's contents. Hearing him laughing and having fun as he did so only granted me smiles as well.

I called in. Fury asked why it took so long.  
“Ask Wade...better yet, you him the map, so…”  
“Say no more.” I could just imagine him pinching the bridge of his nose, “We’ve got a helicopter on it's way.”  
“Thanks.”  
I hung up, glad the mission was over.  
“Not quite honey!”  
I looked the the red and black merc, “Huh?”  
“Playing hard to get isn't very nice you know.”  
“Uh...Wade...I'm tired, and I was just trying to get the map-”  
“Shush, I know you missed me!”  
I sighed, “Yes, but that's beside the point-”  
“Come here.” he held his arms out for me.  
I gave him a pointed look, “Not until the mission’s complete.”  
“But you said it was.” There was a pout in his voice.  
“We need to get the documents, and these people, back to headquarters.”  
“Then can I fuck you?”  
I looked at him, mortified, “WADE!”  
I couldn't help but glance at the webbed up people’s shocked faces not three feet away.  
“You're cruel.”  
“And you're an idiot!”  
He huffed at that, walking over to me. Wade brushed the side of my face with his hand, and i caved.  
“Damn it...whatever you want...but wait until we get home.” I said it low enough that the others couldn't hear...I hope.  
Wade leapt with glee, “Yay! I get to fuck Spider-man...again <3!”  
I cringed at his loudness, but couldn't help but smile after

Yeah...I love that man...

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed!


End file.
